~Humans Don't Change~

We all laugh, we all smile, cry and smile some more. Sure, the way it shows from person to person is so different for each and every one of us, nobody really is the same, and even twins have something noticeable in them to set them apart. The point is everyone, we're all humans and in fact, we're all the same.

A lot has been going through my mind lately and just as a normal sign of procrastination I decided to read LGMH. I noticed how so many people in the world, how they all had their own perfect love story to share and even though each of these were different in many ways, inside, everyone felt the same way. They feel the way we do when we read their stories, inspired, happy that the world isnt as bad as they make it out to be, wanting to someday be able to share stories of a similar caliber. To someday find some person, a stranger or a best friend who could make your life better just with a few words. We pretty much all love the same no matter how casual we seem at first...

When we get hurt, we all try to hide it, to save the embarrassment of having to cry, and when we cant anymore we cry to someone we trust, someone who'll be there and comfort us in someway to make it better and help to make the pain go away. Someone who has been there for you through other tough times and you know will be there for you through this time as well. We trust those who earn it, and only those people will know more about you than anybody else. We all hurt in the same way and learn to get over it the same way, it's just a matter of when we can no longer take it in and can no longer smile by ourselves.

Finally we all fight in the same way. When there is something we want so badly, or want to protect no matter the cost, we'll stick by those words and always be there. Even if it means lying and sneaking around in the dead of night, if it means that that one promise is kept then everything would have been worth it. People who call each other racist, they're just sticking up for a race that they feel passionate about and each person would have a race that he/she would want to support and would fight anyone for its recognition.
When we love and promise that we'll be there, when we know it's real, we would risk anything, defy anyone no matter what they say in the end, just to hear them say "I love you" and to see them smile, and likewise whoever's fighting you for it, probably feels the same way, you just happen to be on opposite sides.

So thats just a brief look at things. Yes it is related to how I view life at this point and how I think that some people, even though right now many are trying to accept everyone as who they are inside and not how they seem on the outside, there are those who will never change, but maybe it's not too late for them as we think. Surely if we show them how life would be if they accepted those who were "different", and how the world would change if they could put aside their differences and that people wouldnt care about being "higher" than others or "lower"...Wouldnt that change our world for the better?

Love You All

Song Lam

~Make Life Perfect~

So many things have happened in the past few days. I've built a house for unfortunate people, I've been to the most perfect place in the world without my loved one, I've injured myself countless times on this trip and thats only the starting.

Along this trip, I've also found so many things that are bad, hard to name them all but they're there. Some of them physically, and some of them emotional. All of them affected me really badly.

Something recent made me realise, that no matter how much it may seem to be at any point in time, life isn't perfect. Even when you've found the one person that you love truly and that person is someone who makes your world complete and "perfect" it never really is. Life doesnt hand things to you on a silver platter and say, "Hey, no more surpises ok? lets call it even and from now on, you're set" no such thing. Life always wants to surprise us, to shock us when we least expect it and continuously tries to break us.

Face it, life wasnt designed to be fair, if it was, then the world would have no poverty, no starvation, no wars or no deaths. Life would be one fairytale after the next. Life was designed to test us, to sieve out the ones who have the determination to suceed and change their world for the better from those who get impaled upon life's sword and perish.

The thing is, although life isn't perfect and we cannot expect it to be given to us so simply, we cannot just sit there and let life throw all the punches. We are here, to make use of the time we have here, to attempt to fulfil our dreams whether it be to become rich, to change the world, to find that one person you love, anything to be content. We must follow those dreams, and stop life and make our lives, how we want it.

Life can't be pre planned for us, but we can at least make a sketch of our futures and use that as a guide for what we will become. True, we will face life's many ups and downs, enjoy the highlights and die within from the disappointments, cherish the moments that we love, and try to forget those that we loathe...But in the end Life isn't perfect, it never starts out that way, but that's what we can do, We can strive, to make life perfect, in our own ways, make it perfect, in our own eyes and make it perfect, for ourselves as individuals...

Love you all

Song Lam

~Think Life Through~

My world crumbled around me, a gaping hole where my emotions once ran through...Something that I thought I once knew, that I once believed in, died and vanished blown away like ashes in the wind. My eyes teared up for the first time in so long, and I felt that for once, I could cry the tears I wanted to. That's how I felt about it.

I wanted so much, to break it, as much as it broke me, break it until i could forget about it and leave it in a smoking mess, crying and desolate, lonely as it was before I found it. My anger was so scary, I didnt know what was happening to me, my hurt was so much compared to the small words of comfort that my friends offered me.

They told me to throw it away, and to leave it lying where it was and forget about it, to leave all of my memories behind,and let the waves of time wash it away to heal me. But somehow I felt so wrong about this, somehow I had felt that there was another way,there had to be after all that I had been through to get where I am today, I couldnt even fix a broken string? It couldnt be...

I walked along the beach that night, wading in the ocean letting my thoughts mull through my head like a never ending story, wishing that somehow it wasnt true and that my connection, my string was still intact. My anger still pulsed through me, like a poison burning away the adrenaline that I had for it, marring my want and need for it.

Then I read something that my special friend told me, so recently, something that I always treasure in my heart and in my soul, something that made me, calm down, and just think about things as they went... The string was broken, but that was a long time ago, where I didnt understand what I loved about it. But the string is actually no longer broken, it was repaired and made stronger such a long time ago, just like my love for another person has grown and been made stronger..

I almost let my anger take over me and destroy what makes my life a purposeful one. Something that I could never truly destroy, and if I did I would regret it for the rest of my life because it's one of a kind...

What i'm saying is that, in our lives, there will be so many things that other people do, that we will hate and have a rage at, things that we will want to spite them and hurt them as much as they hurt us and destroy somthing precious to them. but if we let our anger get in the way and blind us to what we would forever regret, then the world becomes a hateful place, one with no forgiveness and no happiness. I'm saying, don't let anger take control, stop and take control of anger, clear your head, however you can, and then think it through, is it really worth losing something, that you shouldnt have to? Is it worth the moment of pleasure for a lifetime of sadness and regret? And you'll come to the same conclusion as I did a long time ago... No..I don't think it is...

Love you all

Song Lam

~Help Change The World With Me~

So a couple of days ago, I found out that after a year of actually no one hassling me about how I look, well, the first person actually did. To decide to discriminate me, just because of how I look and then straight away dislike me giving me no chance to prove myself.

Everyone looks different, no one will ever look the same. I know I'm not perfect, and that I cant change how I look because that's who I am. It defines me from everyone else. Hardly anybody is perfect to everyone else, there's always gonna be something for them to pick on some thing to criticize. And it's understandable to be suspicious of someone who looks different from the norm. Even me, with my difference, have shunned those who I feel are not right. But what I don't do is try not to understand their position, and eventually, I find out that, inside, their all the same, and in fact, they are normal, more normal than everyone else is because they have been exposed to the harsh reality that the world presents them with but they still get through and still manage to laugh and smile like everyone else. That's what annoys me the most is that people don't present others with a chance to prove themselves differently... Not just people who look different, but also people who act their own way.

But when I look to afterwards.. There are people who don't actually care too much about how people look, and there ARE people who search beyond looks. They get to know others, they see them for what they really are underneath, and they also find that some of them, are amazing for what they can offer the society with their ideas and everything. They accept anyone, they give everyone a second chance at being "normal" even though normal is such a broad term.

People like this give me hope that the world isnt collapsing into a void of a society based on looks only with no personality searching at all. These people are those who give everyone hope and make them want to be like them, and therefore they spread around their acceptance and infect others with it. These are the people who change the world in the end.

For those who think that this was a rant about me and how people should accept just me... It's not. This is a rant about everyone including you and anyone else who might be reading this post right now. It's asking you to stop being so judgemental about everyone if you can help it and help to change the world.

Love you all,

Song Lam

~Tears~

When I saw the tears flowing down your face, at that point I knew, that because the world was so hard on you, crying wasn't really a bad thing.
The tears you cry, are tears of sadness for the suffering throughout this earth. It was your way of expressing your thoughts, that were so strong that they could not be materialized into words. Your tears... were your heart.
But for me, I couldn't cry, my tears could not show what I felt inside of me. At that point, when my life shattered I could not show the pain that was cutting me up inside. I was bleeding internally with no way to release it. All I could do was cry tears within me. It numbed my pain, but could not dissolve it.
And when you came into my life, I could not cry the tears of joy that I felt at being repaired. Everything was inside of me. I could not express anything that I could ever have felt for you. I was too afraid of losing everything by showing my tears. I had to be strong, for those who could not be strong themselves, who needed someone to be strong for them, had to be strong, for those who were preying on me being weak, had to be strong, for myself.
I told myself that tears were for the weak, for those who could not hold themselves together at times of pain and distress. And I would never become weak.

And yet, here I am, crying like a fool, because you came into my life, and I never want to let you go, or lose you in any way. My tears, are for you now.

~Love you all~

Song Lam

~Guess I'm Just Lucky Like That~

I think that so far in life, I've been pretty lucky. Even though I was born differently and had a more intense upbringing than most kids I know, I think life so far has been pretty awesome. Specially when I'm nearing the end of high school. It's a relief to just get out there and experience the world at its best and its worst. Kinda scary thought though.
Also, I think luck was definately on my side, throughout my life even though most times it didn't. I think most of my luck went towards me surviving my operations. If thats not good luck, then I have to really think hard about what is.
I have a loving family, although we have our arguments, we bypass them and we come out better on the other side. It's funny to think that when I was younger, I always dreamed of getting out of this place and leaving my family behind. But now, as that opportunity comes closer, I have a feeling that, I don't really want to do that.
Some people also define luck as having somebody who they can stake everything on. All their troubles, happiness and other things, that person would always be there for them to listen, to laugh and to cry with them. If that's luck, then I've been lucky 8 times so far. In a game of pool, the "8" ball is the last ball to sink. And heres hoping that this shot is bad, because I don't want to let this ball end anytime soon. Right now, I count myself as one of the luckiest people in this world. It may not be financially lucky or anything like that, but this luck is sometimes more important. I'm lucky in so many ways, but I think the one that makes me feel so lucky right now, is that one person. Guess I'm just lucky like that I guess =D

Love you all,

Song Lam

Night and Day

When you smile, your eyes are brighter than the sun, and light up any place and chase all the sad thoughts and dark feelings away. When you smile, my heart is lighter because of you and it always makes my day. When you smile, I feel like I could do anything I wanted to, like I could break any barrier that stood between us no matter the cost. When you smile, you are my daylight.

When you cry, I feel like I want to be there for you, to wipe away the tears that don't belong there. When you cry, your dark eyes glisten with tears like the stars of the night sky. The reflection in your eyes to me, are like the full moon. The tears that flow down your face are the rivers in the unknown slowly making their way toward the sea down below. When you cry, you are my night.

When you are the night, I want to stop your tears, and I want to play God and change the night into day, To make you smile that smile that makes everything else seem great, that makes the world a better place. Sometimes, we all need a substitute God in our lives, to help us along the way. And If You'll be mine, I'll be yours.

Just a Random Thought~

Nowadays we cannot rely on the media to push forward what really matters. Everytime we turn on the television or turn on the news in the radio all we hear is the killings, the robberies and the frauds that people have committed. Blood, death, sadness and sorrow, it seems that there is nothing left that the world has to offer to make someone smile or feel glad. Humanity has turned into a dead race.

But this only applies for some of us. Athough we do not realise it there is so many things all around us that give us joy or give us hope. And on these things, we stake our lives, our future and our very being. They could be anything in the world. A person's favourite meal after an unhappy day, or a hug from the person that you missed most. It could be your family being there and cheering you on, supporting you in every way that they can or it could be that special someone who sets your heart racing just because you know that you both feel the same way. It could be something as small as an encouraging smile or something as miraculous as the giving of life. When we feel down but someone has the thought to help us along the way, we feel that humanity has not become a lost race and that although there are those who destroy and reap what they sow for themselves, there are those who still wish to see happiness in those who really matter no matter they be good or bad. Those who matter most, is us, the world and everything in it nothing can be more precious than the human life.

Thus, when you know that someone is down, or just not acting right, give them something to stake everything on, give them the support and friendship that they will need to live it through. Be there for those who need it and they'll be there for you, no matter what they have to go through. These are what we call, unbreakable bonds.

This is dedicated to my friend who still remembers me even after so long.(you know who you are) I'm sorry I couldn't be there for you in your time of need and saying that, I sign off with the usual

Love you all~

Song Lam

Friends

Let's face it, life wasn't meant to be easy. No matter who you are, no matter what you can do, there's always somethings that will try to hold you back. You may be a smoking hot person but there will always be the sense of sadness that some people will only like you for your looks and not your personality. For someone who is talented, they may not be perfect looking, or they may encounter stress when they have to keep to their standards that they themselves set. Life doesn't really make it easy for us.

But what life has done, is that it has made our journey easier by providing us with people who are like us, people who can understand us. These people can be described in so many ways but there is one word that can sum them all up. It's "Friends" These people in fact, may not be like us at all. They may be entirely different and we may even argue with them a lot but in the end of it all, you still walk away together with no trouble at all. Its these kind of people who can keep you going in life, and that you know that they'll be there for you when you need them, and that you would be there for them when they needed your help.

These people keep your hope alive and that no matter where you are, what you do, or how you feel like on whatever day, they will always be there, smiling, laughing, arguing and just doing what they are best at. Being there for each other.

Love you all~
Song Lam

Nature Is True Beauty

I've stated this in my previous post so i want to elaborate on this...

When someone sees a sunset, or a sunrise, the glistening of the water, or the gentle swaying of the trees, their breathe is taken away, for one moment, and in that moment it seems that even time has held its breath. In that one moment, that person is taken, away from the city life, away from all the stress and troubles of the modern world.

The person see's through his/her eyes the world that was there before humankind lived upon it and destroyed it with its technology and pollution. The world that was created for us to enjoy its spectacular beauty and its grandness. The dewdrops falling from a leaf just after the previous night's rain, the glistening of the ocean as the sun's magnificent rays touch the surface.

All these are understatements that we can never correct. Love poems throughout history have tried to put these moments into words but although they have created words far beyond a normal human's capabilities still they cannot fully describe the moment in the same way that they have experienced.

Each moment is different to each human being. Nature is forever changing never once to be the same as another moment in time. Thus nature will never err from itself and for generations to come, after this generation has long died and disappeared from the face of the Earth, nature will continue to inspire and remind us of how this world used to be, of the world's purity before the corruption.

We are all beautiful -proven!-

This is a short post, but I think that its extremely meaningful,

I was thinking about this on the bus as I saw my reflection and then something suddenly occured to me. Just the day before I had thought to myself as I watched a sunset, how nature simply cannot be captured into a description of any kind. Even a photograph cannot convey to its viewers how the photographer felt when he saw the scene.

Thus Nature is Beauty, Therefore Beauty is Natural. We are all Natural and therefore, We are all beautiful in our own way.

Love you all

~Song

With Love (in my own words)

Just before I close my eyes, and open them the next day, my thoughts drift back to you. Your face whether it was sad or joyous too hard for me to describe, your eyes that sparked with amusement everytime I was with you and your radiant smile, everytime I saw it I would feel light inside no matter what I had felt throughout the day you could always lift me up.

When you cried I wanted to be there, to comfort you no matter how far the distance, whether you were right next door or halfway across the world. When you had something great happen to you that day, I loved how I was the first one that you rang up or ran to find and tell. I couldnt tell what it was back then.

Everyday, when I see your picture, everytime I hear your name. Even when people call their friends I look around, hoping that it would be you. But then, every single time, when I'm wrong, I hate myself for thinking that you would still be with me, because now all you are is a distant memory, of fond times and a shared love and loss. The saviour to my darkness, and the oppressor of my pain, you were my World, my Life, my Everything.
That's what Love feels like to me. And no matter how many times I try to forget, there's no denying what I feel inside. I Miss You and one day, I'll be with you, somewhere, no matter how.

With Love,

Song Lam

Freedom

As I sat there, across from the man who held my life within his hands. That key was all that kept me in these chains that held me down.. He noticed my wistful gaze on his right hand and smmile slowly.. A smile that never reached his eyes. Slowly the key returned to his pocket, and slowly, deliberately he asked me...

"What Do You Want In Life? What Do You Hope To Achieve? What Would You Gain From Release?"

I thought carefully as I prepared my answer knowing that one word could send me back never to see the daylight again. Never to see Her again.... Then, the words formed on my lips and flowed out without effort...

"Love, Loss, Happiness And Grief, I've Had All Of Those, What I Want Now Is Freedom. To Soar Without Any Chains Bound To My Aching Feet, That Is My Only Desire"

As I said that, his face grew haggard and his eyes reminded me of someone who had seen many terrible things throughout his life. The Jailer seemed older now than ever before right at this moment...

"With Every Freedom There Comes A Price, Which Some Are Not Willing To Pay, Do You Understand The Consequences?"

"Of All These Years In My Life, I Have Finally Learnt The One Thing That I Should Have Long Ago. Everything Has A Price, And Yes, I Am Willing To Pay Anything For Freedom From This Dark Hole" I answered coolly, meeting his gaze for the first time for this conversation.

The Jailer held my gaze for a moment, then abruptly stood up.
"Then Be Free, And Live Once More"

~Buying Freedom, The Catharsis, By Song Lam~

Love The World

One day you'll stop and reflect about life, you'll remember everything good and everything bad.
You'll remember the laughter and the tears, the joys and the heartaches. You'll remember every moment of achievement and every moment of disappointment.
When you think of the bad times, you'll start to think that life hasn't been fair to you and you wish that you could go back and do it again. We all do....
But then remember the good times and the times where you've laughed so hard that it hurt, whether it was with friends, ex friends or family, the times where a few words would set your heart racing.
That makes us hesitate, and wonder if we would change all that but many of us still would. We all have regrets in life and things we wish we could have done or said which may or may not have made our lives better.
Maybe we lost a friend that we wished we still had, or maybe we wished we saved someone who we could have. Either way we all know that that chance is something we will never get in our lifetime and that the mistakes we have made will be with us forever until we are gone.
But we must remember that so are the good times, we can learn from the past and acknowledge the things that we have done wrong and right. We can be proud of our talents and achievements and we can change our mistakes by not repeating them. Life moves on with or without us, the best thing we can do is hold on and let it carry us through our journey and learn which decisions to make and to accept that we are wrong sometimes.
After all, we are all human in every way no matter how we look, or how we act, we are all the same in the end.
Cherish every moment of life and dont let a single second be wasted because who knows what could happen then.
Love The World, By Song Lam